Proto Porn

Aubrey Plaza and the perfect “Why should I care?” look.

Aubrey Plaza and the perfect “Why should I care?” look.

Aubrey Plaza and the perfect “Why should I care?” look.

Denise Milano And A Match Of Tennis. As Einstein Didn’t Say (But It Gets Attributed To Him Anyway): The Definition Of Insanity Is Doing The Same Thing Over And Over Again, But Expecting Different Results. Maybe Her Victim Is Loosing On Purpose?

Denise Milano And A Match Of Tennis. As Einstein Didn’t Say (But It Gets Attributed

This Is Caption Number 256, Or 2^2^3; I Don’t Care Much About Decimal Numbers, But I Occasionally Recognize Binary Anniversaries. So You Could Say That The Number Of My Captions Is Increasing, Not Shrinking, Even If Shrinkage Is The Connecting Theme

This Is Caption Number 256, Or 2^2^3; I Don’t Care Much About Decimal Numbers,

An Experienced Reader Of These Captions Will Notice How She Neither Specifies A Duration Or An Unlocking Condition. I Think He’ll Remember This Bosom Forever.

An Experienced Reader Of These Captions Will Notice How She Neither Specifies A Duration

One Disadvantage Of Belt-Style Chastity Devices For Men Locked Around The Waist: They Stop To Fit If You Gain Weight. Or Maybe That’s Their Main Advantage, Forcing You To Stay Slim.

One Disadvantage Of Belt-Style Chastity Devices For Men Locked Around The Waist:

I’m Wondering Which Country Has Red-Yellow Striped Fences. But Maybe It’s A Privately Owned Fence, And The Owner Can Color The Fence To Her Idiosyncratic Liking.

I’m Wondering Which Country Has Red-Yellow Striped Fences. But Maybe It’s A Privately

It’s Not Sufficient That You Look Good, You Also Have To Hold Yourself In A Conversation With Her Friends And Acquaintances And Colleagues From Work And Leave A Favorable Impression As A Well-Educated, Charming, Witty But Polite Young Man. And It’s

It’s Not Sufficient That You Look Good, You Also Have To Hold Yourself In A Conversation

For The Second Time, I’m Trying To Milk Two Captions Out Of A Single Photo, But This Time, The Justification Is A Bit Better, Since The Second Image Contains The “Reveal”.

For The Second Time, I’m Trying To Milk Two Captions Out Of A Single Photo, But

That Looks Uncomfortable: The Pink Of The Strap-On And The Red Of The Latex Suit Clash In An Uncomfortable Way. Surely That Must Hurt.

That Looks Uncomfortable: The Pink Of The Strap-On And The Red Of The Latex Suit

What’s The Worst That Could Happen? She Looks Nice And Friendly, I Bet She’s Just Joking Around.

What’s The Worst That Could Happen? She Looks Nice And Friendly, I Bet She’s

You’re Quite Lucky That She’s So Lenient.

You’re Quite Lucky That She’s So Lenient.

You’re Quite Lucky That She’s So Sensible And Saves You From Most Of Your Crazy Ideas Your Constant Horniness Makes So Appealing Of You. She Talks You Out Of Most Of Them, Except Those She Finds Herself Amusing.

You’re Quite Lucky That She’s So Sensible And Saves You From Most Of Your Crazy

The Downside Of Being A Spark: The Constant Need For Test Subjects.

The Downside Of Being A Spark: The Constant Need For Test Subjects.

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