Knifeandlighter:one Of The Best Parts Of Being Both Grown, Bitter And Disillusioned Is I Dont Get Things Like Crushes. I Get People Who I Can Stand To Be Around For Longer Than Ten Minutes And Not Want To Kill. And People Who’s Every Breath Sends Me

Tunabatter:das Me

A Married Couple Went To The Hospital To Have Their Baby Delivered. Upon Their Arrival, The Doctor Said He Had Invented A New Machine That Would Transfer A Portion Of The Mother's Labor Pain To The Baby's Father. He Asked If They Were Willing To Try It

Radiopastel: Chillin With The Bae

I Have No Food In My Fridge But I Have Two Cases Of Beer And A Shelf Fill Of Blueberry Redbull. My Priorities Are Fucked.

Knifeandlighter

Knifeandlighter

Knifeandlighter

Knifeandlighter

Pussy Portal

Wontongod:now Tht I Started Drinkin I Wana Drink The Whole 6Pacc Crash That Hoe.

Ouendanl:i Got A Matching Shirt With Fliptuna I’ll Get A Better Pic Of It Later

Naughtysoulmates NekoIRL