i’m laying in my bed eating the rest of my chinese food that i was too full to finish an hour ago, like a gross dumb loser livin’ the high life

i’m laying in my bed eating the rest of my chinese food that i was too full to finish an hour ago, like a gross dumb loser livin’ the high life

Reblog If U Single But Too Cute To Be Single

I Need To Slow Down On The Having Sex Thing Jesus Christ I Know I Really Shouldn&Amp;Rsquo;T Be Embarrassed Because There&Amp;Rsquo;S No Reason For It And That&Amp;Rsquo;S Just The Patriarchy Talking, But I Am Ugh

Lady Amalthea: That Chick Who Makes Porn

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Sexual Feelings

I Was Left Basically Alone All Day At Work Today And So I&Amp;Rsquo;M Really Crabby And Really Tired And I Just Want To Hit Someone

If I Always Message You First, Eventually We&Amp;Rsquo;Re Just Gonna Stop Talking, Because I Always Worry About Bugging People. So I’ll Stop Texting First Because That Makes Me Think I’m Bothering You. It Is A Constant, Ever-Present Fear That Rules All

Eluting: Honestly The Ideal Date Would Be Eating Takeout Chinese In Our Pjs While Watching Netflix And You Play With My Hair

Instead Of $60K For Fucking Potato Salad How About $60K For My College Education Crowd Source Something Actually Important Maybe Because Someday I Will Be Educating Your Children

Housewifeswag: Randombloggerdude: Housewifeswag: Senorfrosty: Housewifeswag: Obi-Wankenblowme: Someone Explain To Me Why I Ever Had To Memorize The Quadratic Formula But Wasn’t Taught The First Fucking Thing About Actual Adulthood There Is No

Redd&Amp;Rsquo;S Strawberry Ale Is Delicious And Everyone Needs To Drink It

GirlsofGoneWildCurvy GirlswithBodypaint