teamalphari: don’t believe any boy who says “i’m not like other guys” unless he has snow-white hair, glowin green eyes and can walk through walls, disappear and fly

teamalphari: don’t believe any boy who says “i’m not like other guys” unless he has snow-white hair, glowin green eyes and can walk through walls, disappear and fly

My Tears Provide The Ocean That My Ships Sail On

Hi It Me

Christineerickson: I Can’t.

Supernovaqirl: Anything Over $10 Is Expensive

Govinduhh: Can’t Wait For Titanic 4D When They Actually Flood The Movie Theater And People Start Drowning And They Turn The Air Conditioning All The Way Down So It’s Really Like You’re A Part Of The Movie

Sshibe: Human!!!! Human!!!! Stop!!!! I’m Dry!!!! Stop The Air Blowy Wooshy Wooshy!!! I’m Dry!!!! I’m Done!!!!

How Can People Lift Weights? My Arms Get Tired Just By Putting My Hair In A Ponytail

Barebackinq: Do You Ever Want To See Some Guys Dick Looks Like? Like I Don’t Want It For Sexual Reasons I Just Want To See What Your Dick Looks Like

Bolto: When I Die I Want That Cool Thing Done Where They Take Your Ashes And Pressurise Them Enough To Turn Them Into A Precious Gem. I Then Want That Gem Forged Into A Swords Hilt So My Heir Can Avenge Me Because Im Not Dying Unless Im Killed I Can

Pajamaben: Employer: Um, Your Application Just Says, “My Mom Is Making Me Do This”?

Ihumpedyourcatthen: I React To My Favorite Celebrities Names Faster Than I Do My Own

Stfuconservatives: Mcdonald’s Partnered With Visa In A Laughable Attempt To Tell Minimum-Wage Workers How To Make A Budget. Here’s What They Suggested. You Are Reading This Correctly: They’re Telling Their Workers They Essentially Have To Take

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