“You make me even more incredibly happy than killing human beings does.”

“You make me even more incredibly happy than killing human beings does.”

“If You Were Credit, I Would Take You Even After John Published His Blog.”

“I Wrote A Story Called ‘The Hungry Donkey.’ It’s About How Much My Ass Wants Your Cock.”

“I Would Let You Give Me A Hug Even If I Didn’t Need To Send And Delete A Text On Your Phone.”

“We’re Not Like The Gravestones At Musgrave Hall. Our Dates Will Never Be Wrong.”

“I Hope Nobody Needs To Say ‘Norbury’ To Me When I Ask You Out.”

“Are You The Night Magnussen Got Shot? Because I’d Like To Slap My ‘D-Notice’ On Your ‘Incident.’“

“Planning Our Dates Will Be Easy. I Know Exactly Where We’ll Need To Be Picked Up For Lunch Two Weeks From Now.”

“I Usually Make Clients Sit In The Chair, But You Can Sit On My Face If You’d Prefer.”

“Are You My Flash Drive? Because I Would Smash Six Busts Of Margaret Thatcher Just To Get You Back.”

“Are You The R In A.g.r.a.? Because You’re The Rose Of My World.”

“I Don’t Need To Be Actually Wetting Myself In Order To Tell The Truth About How Much I Love You.”

“You’re Cooler Than A Dangerous Breakfast.”

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